My mom made a wonderful decision, returning to Cupertino. The view from her house startles me even now, each day, with its beauty, and has sent my mom reminiscing about how she found the house and fell instantly in love with this view. She can look out over the valley from her bed, watching the fog move in, listening to the rain on the roof, gazing out over the vast sea of lights at night.
She is mostly happy, except for the pain, which soars at times and sends us--all of our collective anxiety--reeling. Hospice here has been excellent and very, very responsive; Mom received her second blood transfusion last night, and we are waiting for the results of an endoscopy that will let us know if we can slow the internal bleeding that has become all too evident in the past week. We all focus on enjoying the time with her, drinking it in, watching her smile, listening to her stories in that lovely, lilting voice, holding her hand, kissing her face.
We have no idea how much time is left to her. The cancer seems to be advancing, and it's not clear if we have days or weeks or--unlikely--months left. She is clearly weaker, needing oxygen to breathe easily, but when she smiles the room still lights up.
Suzi's blog is poignant, and expresses what we are all feeling:
We are so grateful for the legions of people who have sent their caring, love, and compassion our way. I will update again in a few days.
With love,
Stephanie
What a beautiful picture of you all, Steph. And thank you for the reassuring confirmation that your mom made the right decision to go home. I felt that when I was there visiting. I'm sorry I missed you when I was there, but know I'm with you all a lot in spirit and sending my love.
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